“You must worship no other gods, for the Lord, whose very name is Jealous, is a God who is jealous about His relationship with you.” (Exodus 34:14 NLT)
Jealousy can be a very destructive emotion in any relationship, even with God, but it helps to see it in context. The jealousy that God has for us isn’t selfish or self-focused, it’s healthy and liberating. It focuses on us and our wellbeing, not on Himself.
When I was in high school, I was very jealous. I didn’t want another boy to look at my girlfriend, she was “MINE.” It will likely come as no surprise to you, but my jealousy cost me my relationship with her. My greatest fear became her reality because she translated my jealousy as a lack of trust. And why wouldn’t she? At its root that’s essentially what jealousy is.
Believing another human being belongs to anyone but the Lord is destructive, debilitating, and damaging. It violates who a person is at their core. If I suspect or know you don’t trust me, there’s nothing upon which to build a friendship. Trust is a critical foundation for any relationship. Would you take your car to someone you didn’t trust? How about a doctor, attorney, anyone whom you were concerned wouldn’t provide whatever service you needed?
God isn’t jealous in the sense that He wants to “own” us to the exclusion of any other relationship, fearing He’ll never measure up or that someone or something else will bring us more satisfaction, contentment, or joy. He knows that ONLY HE can give us what we need to be everything He designed and created us to be.
His jealousy isn’t fearing we’ll find more of whatever life offers from another source, it’s concern we’ll settle for less and miss all He has for us. For example, let’s say our goal is to become a millionaire by the time we’re 35 years old. That’s our life’s mission, so, we commit to doing whatever it takes to get what we want. We’ll lie, cheat, bend rules, break laws – they’re all “fair game” if that’s what it takes to make our goal.
Finally, we turn 35 and we assess our life. We have lots of money, but our heart is empty. We have no real friends because we’ve driven them all away with our selfish obsessions. We may live in a fabulous house, but it’s empty of love. We drive a very expensive car, but it’s no fun because we don’t want to leave it anyplace for fear it will be damaged or stolen. We don’t own the things we have; they own us. That’s far inferior to God’s plan for us.
But there’s another kind of jealousy that can be constructive and positive. Leslie J. Barner wrote: “I didn’t realize my marriage was suffering or that my husband felt neglected until he shared his feelings and asked, ‘When are you going to make time for me … for us?’ … my husband had become jealous. He felt like I had allowed other things in my life to take his place. I discovered this kind of jealousy isn’t negative, it’s natural.
Our spouse, who is our number one priority after God, if we are married (see Genesis 2:24), can experience that same type of jealousy at times. Sure, life can get a bit hectic with many things, even good things, vying for our attention. But we can still make sure that the priority of our marriage doesn’t get lost. We can find ways—like spending time with her before gaming with friends or cutting back on time spent serving others to lavish attention on him—that communicates, ‘You are my number one. Nothing is more important than our marriage.’”
Food for thought.
Blessings, Ed 😊
Walking With Jesus 